slavesincorporated

Berry Boys

In humor, Office, Technology on March 5, 2011 at 17:22

Seriously, which straight guy would like to be associated with a fruity-sounding group like that? Why would you want to tag along in any vain corporate gimmick for that matter? If you do not have an identity of your own, can’t you build one? You may not be a case study-worthy personality but at least you won’t be a fruity boy.

Companies bestow this fine piece of technology on the hierarchical few whose time, words and actions are at a premium. If they do not appear so, perhaps the device can help project things thus. So the company pays for the hardware, the software and the extravagant services. Fine. Go ahead, be a Berry Boy. You’ve earned it!

But people who procure the device out of pocket…common. Even if you finch and pay for the services, you ain’t gonna get access to your company account on your modesty. Your designation ain’t man enough, yet. Sorry. You sling it around your waist like a tumor or hang it around your neck like a ghastly ornament; you will look like a twerp either way. Not only are you a sub-privileged fruity boy, you had to pay for it!

Technology may be a lot of things but it can’t be a prosthetic for your lack of confidence or vain ambitions. There are always options though, like diesel cars and open source software. So I stick with an earthier and less fruity ‘smart phone’ or as I like to call it: ‘Poor Man’s Berry!’

–          J.

  1. […] that you were not prepared for this day. You have already bought a fruity replacement for you war horse years ago. But it has never seen the light of day. You just carry it in your bag […]

  2. […] You want to walk out into a half day. But you can’t before you finish your assignment for the day: sending a Christmas greeting to all your customers, many of whom have only a casual acquaintance with English. Also you need to make the greeting ‘different’ as ordered in the two-liner from Head Slave’s fruity phone. […]

  3. […] This is a guy who uses words like gumption for one. And the uncoolness of exchanging smileys with your boss is rivaled only by your Mom adding you on Facebook! But there it is, staring at you at the end of another cryptic one liner sent from his fruity phone. […]

  4. 😀
    thnx

    how much did u pay 4 it?
    It is a 1 time investment…for a couple of years
    I’m sure sum1 like u can make d most of it

  5. The company didnt pay for the hardware.. i did 😦 anyways, good write-up and nice timing 😀

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