slavesincorporated

The Overlord and the Underling

In Boss, dust bin, Head Slave, humor, Office humor, SlavesInc on December 15, 2011 at 01:40

Nothing says occasion like confetti. The last time you saw this species of decoration was X’mas. The last time you saw it in office was never. Any hint of out-of-ordinary scheme of things should excite you. But a childhood fear of crowds comes back to you instead.

You sit your grey frame down amidst the conspicuous party supplies. You figure it must be someone’s B’day or deliverance (retirement). After some time, you notice you are the only one working. Distant voices of merriment make you pinch yourself to rule out a day dream. As a slave-cum-reveler passes by, he stops to answer the Q on your face. ‘Haven’t you seen the mail? The Global Head of Continuous Improvement is visiting our office for the very first time!’

Your solar system stopped at Head Slave and Slave-in-Chief. But little did you know about the Global Head of CI. This is just the kind of Greater Evil that is unveiled at the beginning of a forced movie sequel (You thought Dinosaurs were bad? Now they can talk, and fly). The ascending and descending orders in ‘Sort by Date’ always confused you. Closer inspection reveals an unread mail titled ‘Time to Party’. You had almost put it into spam.

What follows over the next few days is nothing short of royal treatment. Red carpets are rolled out. Lights you did not know existed on the office ceiling are turned on. The relieving room is overstocked with tissue and toilet paper. At lunch, nothing but the finest assortment of local seasonal fruits is presented to the Overlord. Though all slaves have survived on plain old tap water all these years, only mineral water will do for Mr. O.

On one of his impromptu get-to-knows with random slaves, you too are part of the crowd. Mr. O bables away puffing on his stick as the drones listen attentively but without much comprehension. You almost shout at a fellow slave who throws a cup of coffe inches from the dustbin. The wayward cup falls just a couple of feet to Mr. O’s left. But what catches your attention instead is even more horrifying. Mr. O just dropped his stick and walked away as randomly as he had appeared. He didn’t even put it out. Having proved yourself a true Underling, you will not be so eager to please next time.

– J.

  1. […] Overlord is here today dressed in a three piece. He seems content overlooking the flock from the vantage of […]

  2. Your razor-sharp wit is also laser-beam spot-on. You are a one-person slicer-and dicer. Management, BEWARE! 😉

  3. Too true… Sometimes the noses are so far up the overlord’s wazoo that if he smells pepper they sneeze…

  4. Euphemism is correct

    Top to bottom income disparity is an upcoming post on Slaves

  5. Why am I not surprised. And don’t forget that “Continuous Improvement” is a euphemism for cost control, so you can expect a memo about a cost reduction program (which is necessary to recoup the costs of Mr. O’s whirlwind tours).

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